Sisterhood Spotlight

What first inspired you to dedicate your career to supporting the mental and emotional well-being of young people?

My doctors told my parents that I needed open heart surgery when I was 4 years old. It was 1974 and we lived in a small town in New Jersey. My pediatrician heard of a surgeon who was performing heart surgery in New York City so that’s where we went. Back then, they admitted children to the hospital for a week or 2 before surgery for pre-operative care. I shared a large hospital room with several other children with congenital heart disease. As my surgery date approached, there was less time to play and more scary tests. I remember being frightened after seeing my new friend, the girl in the bed next to mine, return after her surgery, crying in pain. Then one morning, a man in a white coat came to see me. He pulled up a chair and sat at my bedside. He pulled out his stethoscope and began listening to my heart. He quietly began a talking to me. “Do you hear that? Do you hear that buzzing? It’s a bumble bee. You must have swallowed a bee. Tomorrow, I am going to take that bee out so he doesn’t sting you any more.” Such a simple conversation meant so much to me and my parents. Someone explained my surgery to me in a way that I could understand. In case you are wondering, the surgery went well. Years later, I learned in my pediatric residency training what my surgeon already knew. Children are not simply small adults. They have growing bodies and minds, experience different illnesses, and require unique approaches to care. This understanding led me to pursue additional fellowship training in developmental behavioral pediatrics after completing my residency.

In 2004, I moved with my family to Richmond, Virginia, where I joined Pediatric Associates of Richmond, a primary care practice. Over the years, I recognized the growing need to support children and young adults facing mental and behavioral health challenges in our community. Gradually, I began returning to my developmental and behavioral training, formally retooling in 2018. By 2023, I was ready to dedicate my career to the mental and behavioral health of children, teens, and young adults.

You work with a wide range of children and families—what’s one of the most rewarding parts of helping them navigate behavioral and developmental challenges?

What has been the most rewarding part about my work now is the gift of time - Time to truly understand the complexity of the challenges each patient and family faces, to fully appreciate the important role parents and caregivers have in shaping who we become, and to recognize my own deep capacity to care for each of them. I’ve always loved my patients as a pediatrician, but these longer visits give us a chance to share more experiences, build trust, and connect with real compassion and curiosity.

How do you encourage parents and caregivers to take an active, compassionate role in their child’s mental health journey?

First, I encourage parents to give themselves some grace. No one gets an ‘A’ in parenting. It's incredibly challenging – there's no manual, it's always changing, and every child is different. I also encourage parents to lean in when things get hard. It can be tempting to fall into what I call the “happiness trap” — giving in during tough moments just to make a child happy or to end the conflict. While that may bring short-term relief, it often leads to more escalation and bigger challenges down the road. Children don’t need perfect parents; they need parents who parent - who set clear expectations with love and stay present, even when it’s hard.

For families who may be struggling to find support, what resources or first steps would you recommend to help them begin their path toward healing and understanding?

For families who may be struggling to find support, it can be helpful to begin by reaching out to trusted people within your community rather than turning first to the internet. Consider connecting with family members, friends, teachers, faith-based leaders, or your child’s pediatrician—individuals who already understand and care about your family. In addition, community service boards, local mental health organizations, and community support groups may offer programs and resources specific to your neighborhood or region. These local networks often provide reliable and trustworthy guidance to help your family find a path forward. Lastly, I highly recommend the following 2 authors: Dr. Jonathan Haidt and Dr. Arthur Brooks.

About Melissa Nelson

Dr. Melissa Nelson received her Bachelor of Science from Virginia Tech and her Doctor of Medicine from Virginia Commonwealth University.  She completed her residency training at the Weill Cornell University Medical Center at the New York Presbyterian Hospital.  She has additional fellowship training in Developmental Behavioral Pediatrics from the Rose F. Kennedy Center at Albert Einstein University.  In 2004, Dr. Nelson moved to Richmond with her family, where she joined Pediatric Associates of Richmond until February 2023.  Recognizing the increasing need to support children and young adults with mental and behavioral health challenges in our community, Dr. Nelson returned to her original fellowship training skills and began formally retooling in 2018.   She joined the team at Summit Emotional Health in early 2023 until she launched her solo practice in 2025.

Dr. Nelson's career is rooted in service, leadership, and advocacy for children and families.  She currently serves as the vice chair of the Virginia State Board of Health.  She was honored by her pediatrician peers as the 2023–2025 Bundy Professor at Virginia Commonwealth University’s Children’s Hospital of Richmond—a distinction recognizing her commitment to advancing pediatric care.  Her longstanding relationship with Virginia Tech includes her prior service on the Virginia Tech Board of Visitors.  She is currently a member of Virginia Tech’s  Alumni Board of Directors and the Fralin Biomedical Research Institute Advisory Board.   Her work has consistently earned the respect of her peers, as reflected in her recognition in Richmond Magazine’s “Top Docs” issue across multiple years.   In 2015, she was named Person of the Year Honoree by the Richmond Times-Dispatch and one of the YWCA’s Outstanding Women for her leadership in advocating for an independent children’s hospital in Richmond.  In her free time, she and her husband, Dr. Kinloch Nelson, enjoy spending time with their family and friends.